I’m Not Sure My Life Gets Better After This

19 July 2019Jim Ganley

The poem below was the winning submission to the Grade 12 Melhuish dramatic monologue contest. A wordsmith, Haley also earned 97% on the provincial exam and was a cornerstone of the 2018-2019 yearbook. Uncle Jim, if I’m being honest here, I don’t think I could count on all my fingers and all my toes all the people who told me “Life only gets better after high school”. It’s almost become a cliché; the phrase has been so overworked. Please, don’t patronize me. I’ve liked high school. It’s one of the only times in adolescence when it is okay to not know who you are, what you want to be, Or what “Picking the right wine with dinner” actually means. It’s tumultuous and unique. I’m talking about high school, not the wine. I’m pretty sure dinner wine isn’t supposed to be tumultuous and unique. Unless it is? You tell me. As someone who has no clue as to what the future holds, I revel in the idea of not knowing. I don’t lie awake at night trying to crack the premature code of adulthood. For crying out loud, I’m 17 years old! I can’t even vote, much less buy a scratch off ticket! If I’m too young to win the lottery, how can you expect me to be mature enough to decide a career? I don’t even know what I’m capable of yet. Who knows, I could possibly have the unlocked potential of a gifted fifth grader. We’ll never know if I decide to become an accountant at 17. The issue of dormant potential isn’t just unique to me, As surprising as that may be for you to hear. I think the girl next to me in Pre-Calculus could be a future President of the United States. And that quiet boy in the back of my Chemistry class? I’d bet my non-existent lottery winnings he’ll one day cure an incurable disease and win a Nobel Prize. Maybe one day I’ll have my future all mapped out. It won’t matter anymore if I didn’t get an A on that group project I did all by myself. Because, when I have it all figured out, in many years from now, There won’t be any more group projects. I won’t ever have to use trigonometry again. I know I’ll love the future. I’m not saying the moment I leave high school I’ll dive deep into rock bottom with no floaties on. I know the next four years will change my life in ways unimaginable. But high school changed my life too. So yes, Uncle Jim, I am excited for college, But no I’m not tearing at the seams to leave high school behind. Haley Hockin, Allard ‘19

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